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Understanding the behaviour

What is child to parent abuse?

Child to parent abuse describes a pattern of behaviour where a child or young person uses physical, emotional, or financial abuse to control or harm a parent or carer. It is more common than many people realise, and can be deeply isolating for parents who feel ashamed, disbelieved, or afraid that speaking out will lead to consequences for their child. It is not the same as normal teenage conflict — it is a pattern of behaviour that causes real harm. Understanding it is the first step to getting the right support.

  • Child and parent abuse (CPA) is estimated to affect around 1 in 10 families in the UK, though it is widely considered to be significantly underreported. (Source: Papadopoulos et al. / PEGS).
  • CPA can include physical violence, emotional abuse, financial abuse, and damage to property — and, like domestic abuse, it is rarely a single incident but a pattern of behaviour over time.
  • Parents experiencing CPA are often reluctant to seek help due to shame, fear of not being believed, or concern about consequences for their child. (Source: PEGS research / Holt, S.)
  • CPA frequently occurs in families where children have been exposed to domestic abuse — meaning many young people who cause harm have themselves experienced abuse in the home. (Source: Holt, S. 2013 / PEGS).
  • Without appropriate intervention, CPA can escalate and continue into adulthood — making early, specialist support crucial for both the young person and the parent or carer.
Why it matters

Recognising the signs early

You might be one of the first to notice something isn’t right at home, sometimes before a family feels ready to talk about it. Parents and carers often feel ashamed, frightened, or worried they’ll be blamed, which can make it even harder to ask for help.

Responding with warmth rather than judgement can make a real difference, and can help the whole family access the right support. As with other types of domestic abuse, no single sign tells the whole story – it’s the pattern that counts.

Find what you need

Next steps for support and awareness

Whether you’re curious to learn more about abuse, recognise these behaviours in your own relationship, or want to support someone else, we can help you find your next step. Browse below to find training, signs of abuse, or ways to get in touch — whatever feels right for you.

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Get immediate support

If you or someone else needs support: We’re here Monday to Friday, 9.30am to 4.30pm excluding bank holidays (7.30pm on Wednesdays) – 24/7 confidential answerphone available outside these times.

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Download safety resources

Download resources designed to help survivors and the people who support them.

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Learn about other abuse types

Sexual abuse rarely happens on its own. Explore Physical abuse, emotional abuse and other forms of domestic abuse to see the fuller picture.

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Understand your legal options

Wondering what protection is available? From key terms, to the Domestic Abuse Act, we can help you understand your rights and the routes to safety.

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Professional guidance and training

We deliver training for professionals and communities, in person and online, to help you spot the signs and respond confidently.

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Shop materials and resources

Browse our activity booklets and safety resources, designed to support healthy relationships, safety planning and awareness, for individuals, families and professionals.

Get in touch

Get in touch

We’re happy to answer questions from schools, professionals, and families. Get in touch – email CYP@equation.org.uk or visit our contact us page.

Still not sure about making a referral?

Many people find it hard to reach out, and that’s okay. Help is here whenever you’re ready. Our team listens to whatever you share, by any method that feels right.

Get in touch with our services

We aim to contact you within 1-2 business days.