Someone I know needs help
If you’re worried about someone experiencing abuse, you don’t need all the answers. Small, steady support can make a real difference. This page covers simple ways to help, how to raise a concern with us, and words you can use when you’re not sure what to say.
Report a concern for someone else
Send us your concerns and we’ll contact you (not the person you’re worried about) to talk it through and advise on next steps. If they’ve given consent, we can support them to refer too: with you as the point of contact, or helping them complete their own form.
Still not sure about making a referral?
That’s completely okay. If you’d like to talk things through first, you can have an informal, no‑pressure chat with us. We’re here to help you decide what feels right for you.
Complete the form below for help and support
We aim to contact you within 1-2 business days
After a referral, or what you can do without one
Once you refer, we’ll get in touch to talk through your concerns and suggest next steps – there’s no pressure to do anything you’re not ready for. If you’d rather not refer yet, that’s fine. Why not try some simple, supportive things you can say in the meantime? Just remember:
- Keep it calm, not urgent.
- Let them lead the conversation.
- There’s no perfect script here.
Tell them: I believe you
Tell them that you believe them – even if you’re shocked tell them that you believe them. Anyone can experience abuse. Knowing one person believes them can make a real difference.
Thank them for telling you
Let them know this took courage. Don’t push for details they haven’t offered, and reassure them you won’t share what they’ve told you without their permission, unless it’s an emergency.
Say it’s not their fault
Be clear that nothing they’ve done makes abuse acceptable. The person using abusive behaviour is responsible, not them. This message can ease shame and rebuild their confidence.
Ask what they need now
Let them know free, confidential advice is available whenever they’re ready. Don’t pressure them to leave — being able to decide for themselves makes it more likely they’ll reach out.
Support options for someone you care about
Not sure where to start? These are different ways we can help, depending on your situation. Pick whichever feels closest to you — you don’t need all the answers before reaching out.
Help for Women
Contact Juno Women’s Aid for confidential support for women experiencing abuse, whatever their situation. They will listen without judgement and help you plan safe, practical next steps together.
Help for Men
At Equation we offer free, confidential support for men experiencing abuse. Many men worry they won’t be believed — we’re here to listen and help, without judgement.
Help for Children
View our Get Help page for support for children and young people affected by abuse at home, helping them feel safe, heard, and understood as they process what’s happened.
LGBTQ+ Support
View our Get Help page for specialist support for LGBTQ+ people experiencing abuse. We understand the specific barriers you may face, and we’re here to help, whoever you are.
Stalking Advice Service
View our Get Help page for advice and support if someone is following, watching, or contacting you repeatedly and it’s making you feel unsafe. You don’t have to face it alone.
Local & National Helplines
On our Get Help page you will find a list of trusted helplines you can contact for advice, support, or just to talk something through — whenever you need to, day or night.
Important information to keep in mind after your first conversation
Be safe — it’s the number one priority
People who use abusive behaviour can be dangerous, so put safety first. Talk somewhere private and face-to-face if you can — phones, social media, and emails might be monitored. Don’t push your friend into anything they’re unsure about, and never confront the person directly. Call 999 if anyone’s in immediate danger.
Be kind — offer suggestions, not demands
You could offer to call the helpline together, or go with your friend to see a doctor, solicitor, or the police. Offer a place to stay, or help them put together an emergency bag. They could use your address for post. Together, you could look into safety planning. Keep it as an offer, not an instruction — your friend may make choices you wouldn’t, and that’s their right. Try not to judge, and keep your door open.
Be there — whether they leave or stay
It’s not your job to convince your friend to leave. Leaving is rarely simple, and people often return several times before it sticks. Don’t lose hope — a decision is more likely to last when it’s truly theirs. Stay in touch, and stay understanding.
Other national service
Equation isn’t the only place to turn. These national services offer specialist, confidential support and advice — for the person you’re worried about, or for you as you help them through it.
National Domestic Abuse Helpline (Refuge)
0808 2000 247National Stalking Helpline
0808 802 0300Galop LGBT+ Domestic Abuse Helpline
0800 999 5428
Frequently asked questions
Not sure where to start? These are the questions we’re asked most often about domestic abuse, recognising it, and reaching out. If you can’t find what you need here, get in touch — we’re happy to talk it through.
Am I overreacting or wrong?
Trust your instincts. You don’t need proof or certainty to raise a concern — if something feels wrong, it’s worth talking to us or your friend.
What if my friend doesn’t want help?
That’s okay. You can’t force someone to accept support. Keep listening, stay in touch, and let them know you’re there whenever they’re ready.
Can I refer someone without their knowledge?
You can share your concerns with us, but this starts a conversation with you — not a referral made on their behalf without them knowing.
Can I contact Equation directly by phone?
Yes — call us: We’re here Monday to Friday, 9.30am to 4.30pm excluding bank holidays (7.30pm on Wednesdays) – 24/7 confidential answerphone available outside these times.
Will you tell them I contacted you?
No. If you refer your concerns to us, we’ll contact you directly — not the person you’re worried about — unless you ask us to.
Should I confront the person hurting them?
No — this can increase risk for both of you. Focus on supporting your friend instead, and call 999 if anyone is in immediate danger.
Can I refer them with their consent?
Yes. If your friend agrees, you can support them to refer — either as their point of contact or by helping them complete their own form.
What if they’re not ready to leave?
That’s common, and leaving isn’t simple. Don’t pressure them — a decision is more likely to last when it’s truly theirs, in their own time.